Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Blog-Cheating

Okay! In an interest to save time, I'm posting an old post that I posted on our church's website last... June? It's about fatherhood, and it's a good one! Enjoy!

____________________________________________

Children are some of the most amazing people! After working with children for around six years, I’ve found that they never cease to amaze me. Everything from their creative imaginations, to their need for fun, to their blunt honesty, and their ever-fluctuating emotions, it’s no wonder that Jesus tells us that the kingdom of heaven is “of such” (Matt. 19:14) The innocence, purity, and unwavering faith of children is something that we as adults should always strive for.


Almost two and a half years ago, I became a father. God saw fit to bless Keri and I with our wonderful little girl, Jazmine. Ever since then, she has been a constant lesson and reminder to me of exactly what it means to have a Father’s love. It’s something that we all think we understand before actually becoming parents. After all, we know what love is. As children, we loved our stuff animals, toys, chicken nuggets, and pizza. As teens, we “loved” that special someone and couldn’t wait to see them again. As adults, we love our spouses, jobs, things, etc. However, there is nothing that can prepare you for experiencing a father’s love until you’ve become one yourself.


As a child, I knew that my dad loved me. He told me so quite often. He’d take me fishing, or go play with me on the dirt hill. He’d go off to work graveyards, and the next day around 11, knock on the wall to let me know that he was awake. I’d go running to my parent’s room, throw open the door, and hop into my daddy’s arms. My father is a hard worker, and always made sure that my mother and I were clothed, fed, and had a few fun things to keep us busy. Some of my fondest memories of my childhood were at bedtime whenever my dad would tuck me into bed. He’d always tell me silly stories he made up about wiggle worms, monkeys and such. He’d chop his arm down, and with a shout of “TIMBER!” let it fall on me like a giant tree. Inevitably, as he’d scratch my head, I’d fall off to happy, dreamy sleep. You see, I knew that my father loved me, but had no idea how much he loved me!


The other night, I was tucking Jazzy into bed. For some reason, she’d chosen me that night to help her get to sleep, and we were in the process of calming her down (not an easy thing to do) Jazmine will lay there, cover up and either say “Pat! Pat!” while patting her back to get us to pat her to sleep, or sometimes she’ll say “Sing shhhh! shhhh! baby...” which is her way of saying “Hush, Little Baby.” Oftentimes, it’s both. That night, we had one of those little moments in time that are unplanned, unrehearsed, and totally honest. Through her sleepy eyes, she looked up at me, smiled, and simply reached up with both hands to touch my cheeks. She began to caress my face in a way that only an innocent child can, and in that moment, I knew that she loved me, and that I loved her. I experienced a father’s love at it’s purest and unconditional form. It was one of those times that I knew that I would do or sacrifice anything to keep her safe and make sure that she grew up to live a life that reflects Christ. It really was a Kodak moment, and I probably shed a tear or two.


It’s in those times that we forget all of the tantrums, the defiant “NO!” the spilled milk, and torn up catalogues. It’s in those moments that we don’t mind the soiled diapers, flung spaghetti, potty training, and retrieving that one toy she threw down the diaper genie for no good reason (trust me, no one should EVER have to dig in one of those things....) It’s in those moments that we slowly begin to get a grasp on how much the Father truly loves us....


You see, as a father, my love is conditional. I can become angry or disappointed with my child, and the emotion can change. Sure, I still care about her, but during those times of “baby rebellion,” my feelings toward her don’t represent Kodak moments! When she’s good, I “feel” more loving towards her. Whenever she’s not so good, I “feel” more... corrective... towards her. It’s a subtle difference in that it’s still an expression of love, just not one that either of us enjoys. Even so, as parents, we live for those special moments of intimacy with our children when they, for whatever reason, just love us with a pure and unashamed admiration. It can be a look, a laugh, a touch on the cheek, or one of those tight squeezes with little arms and sloppy kisses hugs. Whatever the method, those time are preserved in our memories forever.


Think about this: if I as a father look for those instances with my child, how much more does our heavenly Father look for those instances with us? If I as a father can love my daughter this much, how much more does God, our perfect heavenly Father, love us? Like a father’s love, I believe that we can only get a glimpse or some sort of vague concept of how much God truly does love and care for us. The heart of a loving father isn’t something that can be explained or imagined. It simply must be experienced through your own children. In this same way, I think our own understanding of the Father’s love is limited. I think I get some sort of a shallow understanding of God’s love when Jazmine takes the time to let me know that she does, in fact, adore me. However, no matter how many of those Kodak moments we have, I don’t think we will ever really know how much He truly does love us. Even when we’re with Him in eternity, I figure it’s probably unlikely that we will ever understand or comprehend His love.


I John 4:8 tells us that “God is love.” We can experience love, even in the ultimate expression found towards our children and our spouses. However, we can never become love. More importantly, we must understand that God, too, has given everything for those special moments. Consider all that He has given freely to us with no guarantee of any sort of return! People reject and walk away from God every day. Sometimes, those who have long entered into fellowship with Him decided that something else is better, and run to that instead. What’s more, He knows who will accept Him and who will reject Him. This makes it all the more important for those of us who call Him “Abba, Father” to take the time to spend with Him. I’ve often said the only thing that Jesus was guilty of was wanting to love us. We need to be sure that we are not guilty of not returning His love. How do we do this? Through the following:


  1. 1.Love God, Love Others

  2. -We need to love God most of all. However, our love for Him must be reflected in our love for others.


  1. 2.Hear and obey the Word.

  2. -John 15:9 & 10 reads:


As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love.


We hear Jesus’ commandments through the Word. Whenever we do what the Word says, then we are expressing our love to God.


  1. 3.Spend time with God.

  2. -Relationships are always built over time. Without time spent together, there can be no relationship! Imagine marrying someone you just met on the street! There’s no real way that could work because you’ve never spent time together! Relationships take time to build, and not just casual time in each others presence. Quality time is of the essence! Unless we spend time with God praying, worshipping, and in His Word, we will never come to know Him any better. He already knows everything about you and loves you unconditionally, so it is imperative that we take the time to learn more about Him.


There is no better substitute for establishing a relationship with the Father than spending time with Him. The Bible tells you how He feels about you. That’s why it’s so important to read and understand it. The time you spend with God is how you tell Him how you feel about Him! Don’t approach your time with God as a “God bless me” approach! Use that time to express your love towards Him. The one thing that God is looking for from us is our love and fellowship. That’s why He created us in the first place! Our purpose is to first love God, then to love others. When we concentrate on that, we will have “Kodak moments” with God. Take the time to reach up and caress His face and let Him know that in spite of all the little things, you still love your Father.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Tapping Out to Chinese/Mexican/Belizians...

I must say that I'm proud of myself. I have never been this regular when it comes to blogging. I think it's actually quite cathartic. Of course, you never have any guarantee that anyone is reading any of these. Then again, I suppose that's why Facebook is so popular. It's everybody's chance to do a little blogging that everyone on your friend's list has a chance to read. For some people, it seems like they take this to an extreme, but really, do we care that you're getting a double-shot venti dark cherry mocha? (that's 520 calories for a drink!!!) That you're now at the mall? That you're getting your nails done? I think the worse is when people write in LOLCat: ("I haz longh daize and meesh sweepy!") O really.... Facebook is vastly easy to overdo. I think the most liberating thing for me to discover was when I went *gasp* a day without updating my status. Again, this is coming from a guy who puts haikus in his status updates on occasion, so you can pretty much disregard anything I've just said (except for the lolcat thing... really people!) Feel free to facebook your life away to everyone, because you never know who's reading what you just said about your terrible boss/bother/spouse/co-worker.... sheesh!
(Please note that most of the people I know aren't this obsessive about facebook, but some people will never learn...)

Well, now for something completely different... but related to the title.

Tomorrow night I'm excited that I'll get to spend some QT with our missionary friends from Belize. We're going to dinner at a family member's house who loves to cook. Now, the negative side to this (aside from excessive gastric/caloric consumption) is that I'll have to miss no-gi night. This will be the 2nd no-gi night in a row that I've missed (no-gi is on Thursdays) What this means is that the next time I roll no-gi, I'll be all pajama-man combat ready, but realize that the coat of 1000 handles is missing. That's okay, open mat is Saturday, so I'll be able to brush up then.

At any rate, had a great night with the kids at church. We started discussing Samson... which is funny because I can't seem to get away from Samson during these blogs... I apparently blogged about Samson over a year ago several blogs below. At any rate, we'll finish Samson up next week. The blog looks like it pretty much covers some of what I said about him, and probably what I'll finish saying about him. It amazes me how God uses us, flaws and all, to accomplish amazing things for Him. Of course, the main flaws we discussed in Samson tonight were:

1. Not honoring his parents.
2. Being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people.
3. Not being serious in his commitment to God.

At any rate, I'm cutting it short. I've got to get some rest so I can spend time with Jazzy tomorrow who's knocking the mess out of croup, but is still somewhat contagious. God bless!

-B

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

So.... Tired. :{

It's been a busy week! The first half of this week has consisted of piecing together the lose ends of our EK Spring Training Day (i.e.: baseball camp) and making sure our follow-up gets out. The good news is I've succeeded! There's no bad news...

So, I finally made it back to BJJ tonight. I missed the last 2 classes due to the aforementioned camp. Tuesdays are gi nights, which means we run around in the pajamas. To the traditionalist, this is BJJ bliss. To me, the gi is a blessing and a curse. Let me start by saying that I enjoy both sides of the BJJ Gi/No-Gi debate. It's quite an interesting thing, and one that really puzzled me when I started training in BJJ. On one side, you have the traditionalists who adore the gi and think that anyone who trains no gi is a fool. On the other side, you have the no gi extremists who understand that, for the most part, you won't be attacked by someone wearing a gi while walking across the Wal-Mart parking lot at 3am carrying your bag of Breyer's Ice Cream and Magic Shell. (for the no gi extremest, see Eddie Bravo... but understand that he's high most of the time! Don't believe me? Check out his buddy Joe Rogan's eyes the next time you watch UFC live...)

For me, I appreciate both! BUT since I started off discussing gi vs. no-gi, let me comment on my blessing/curse comment. I love the gi simply because it is literally the land of 1000 handles. It is the ultimate, bar none, way to control a larger, more aggressive, and more youthful opponent! You can wrap them up in it, pull yourself out of embarrassing situations, choke the mess out of them with various parts of their gi/your gi, and it soaks up a lot of sweat. For real! When you compare a gi night to no-gi night, it's like comparing apples to oranges. The best way to describe the incredible absorbent power of the gi is to compare it either to all of those Bounty commercials on television, or to have the questioneer (that's you) attempt to slide down a slip and slide wrapped in a cotton comforter. There are no gi nights that I literally end up being scooted across the gym floor, simply due to all of the sweat!

So, what about the cons? All of the above! Just like you are able to use the gi to your advantage, your opponent can use your gi to his/her advantage. What would normally be an easy slip out of an armbar on a no-gi night ends up looking like the losing end of a Kumite match in Bloodsport! (Cue Tong-Po saying: "FIRST I BREAK YOUR FRIEND, NOW I BREAK YOU!") This is magnified somewhat if you haven't trained with a gi in a while. You go to move, post out, or whatever, only to discover that yes, your opponent, is grabbing onto your SLEEVE! To make matters worse, since I'm built like Gimli from Lord of the Rings, my sleeves are longer due to my stubby arms, and I end up looking life Fifel from An American Tail trying to escape from a glue trap! It's really quite sad, and I need to get around to asking the Missus if she can hem the sleeves for me...

So, which do I prefer? BOTH! Much of the gi training can still come into effect in the street if you come across someone. In fact, I recall as a teenager many moons ago, essentially cross collar choking my cousin with his t-shirt after watching one of the first UFC's. Of course, I had no better idea of what I was doing than your couch potato buddy on fight night ("DUDE! Did you see THAT!? I bet I could do that..."), but I have to imagine if I could get him to tap being a hapless youth back in the day, I could certainly do it again. Of course, the t-shirt is just as likely to rip as to choke them, but well, you never know unless you try! At any rate, I understand and see the necessity for both types of training and enjoy them both immensely. It leads to interesting internal debates about the other night when we're doing the off night. ("Gee, if this were gi night, I'd choke him with the lapel!" "Gee if this were no-gi night, I wouldn't be playing Fifle caught in a glue trap tonight!")

No matter how you cut it, BJJ rocks! I don't think I meant to go down this thread of thought. I think I was originally going to whine about how my shoulders are sore and tired, and how much doing P90X in the morning with my battered body is going to suck. I'm glad we went this way.

God Bless until next time!

-B

Monday, March 8, 2010

Wait... I have a blog!?!

Dear readers,

It has been so long since I've been on Blogger that I completely forget that I actually had a blog, per se. I suppose I've been so used to writing things through our church website (www.victoryworshipcenter.com) or through my facebook account (www.facebook.com/ekpastor) that I haven't touched this site in a while. It's pretty interesting actually, because it seems like blogger is the one place where I can post "unofficial" things about life, liberty, and the pursuit of all things that interest me. In fact, it wasn't until a friend of mine sent me a link via facebook about an African-American woman who's been taking BJJ that I stumbled back across blogger. At any rate, it's good to be back!

I suppose that since this is an "unofficial" blog (i.e.: not linked to anything relating to VWC or to my facebook account that many "Victorians" visit, I should write something non-related to kids, ministry, or the like. It's not as if, as a pastor, I write things through a tainted lens, thoroughly and scrupulously scrubbed with holy water and liquid soap in other places. In fact, as a pastor, I feel that I'm pretty transparent about my life. I generally try to come off as "un-pastorly" as possible. By this, I don't mean that I act like every average joe on primetime television. I just try to appear as real as possible. I think this comes from my old youth pastor, who generally used the same approach. He never tried to pass himself off through religiosity or the like... he was just himself. But I digress! I'm discussing religion and politics in my "unofficial" blog...

Since a thread on BJJ brought me back to blogger, I should state something about BJJ here. For the uninformed ("What is BJJ? What are you talking about?"), BJJ is short for "Brazilian Jiu Jitsu." ("You mean like karate?") Not exactly. BJJ came from the Gracie family, and is descended from Japanese Judo... ("Wait... It's not JiuJitsu?") No, everything back in the early days was called Jiu Jitsu. Judo wasn't known as Judo back then. ("Oh! So Judo is Jiu Jistsu?") Um... Have you ever watch UFC and seen someone "tap out?" ("Yeah!") That's BJJ. ("Oh! Okay!")

At any rate, I've been in BJJ basically since last June (2009). It's something I've thoroughly enjoyed, become somewhat obsessed with, and something that's pretty much uniquely me. It's caused me to lose weight, become battered and scarred, and generally reshaped my physical life. It's one of those constant things that shifts around my schedule and competes for my time (BJJ or movie? BJJ or family time? BJJ or sleep in late on Saturdays? BJJ Fundamentals on Monday Nights or stay home and not go through the rigorous warm-ups that seem to only happen on Monday Night!?) Any way you cut it, BJJ has been one of the best decisions I've made for health and physical fitness in a long time. I'm collecting the lumps to prove it!

I've joined gyms over the years. I've lifted weights, ran laps, and sweated off many lbs. only to regain them one corn chip or pizza slice at a time. However, gyms and weights mean one thing: HARD WORK! I've never liked to go to the gym. It's something that we do as a discipline in order to try to measure up to some sort of arbitrary standard that's set by the media. In fact, gyms as a whole are a pretty amazing concept. Think of it! Where else do millions of people pay good, hard earned money in our current economy to run on a treadmill that goes to nowhere, and to lift really heavy metal objects repeatedly!? In theory, you could get just as good or even a better workout by simply going out into your backyard with a shovel and 5 gallon bucket, digging a 10x10x3 foot hole and moving the dirt from one side of your yard to the other than by paying a monthly fee to sweat in a building with other like-minded individuals. But of course, you wouldn't get the complimentary towel...

It's been a while since I've blogged, so please excuse my temporary ramblings....

At any rate, the point I'm trying to make is that BJJ, while strenuous at times, isn't as "work-centric" as a gym. In fact, I find that I'm hardly going to the gym at all anymore. It's not that I don't need to, it's just that I hate to. Why would I go to the gym to work out (which is work) when I can simply go to BJJ and enjoy the physical activity there? I've lost weight and gotten into the best shape I've been in for a long time doing something enjoyable, rather than forcing myself to grind out rep after rep and run a little bit faster for the next 5 min. on the walk to nowhere (i.e.: treadmill)

Of course, with all that said, I'm about to start some P90X in the morning with my Bro.-In-Law. The reason? I'm gassing out in BJJ. The more I roll (that means grapple with) the higher belts/younger guys in the class, the quicker I become tired. In other words, my working out is becoming something to supplement my play time. I'm also trying to drop another 25lbs. because I'd like to compete one day. Right now, I'm 195lbs. at 5'6" and while I'm pretty solid, there are much bigger opponents at 195 than 175. So P90X it is!

I'll try to remember about this blogger thing and keep you posted as I go. Next time, I'll try to add some more of my ideas on BJJ and cover something specific, rather than simply go on and on about nothing. Until then, God bless!

-B